This recent article I ran across in the Huffington Post (click title of this post), about blew my mind, especially when I read the first sentence.
Turns out there are parents in the news who do the right thing. Jennifer and John of Ohio have a transgender 10-year-old child, and they support Jackie's decision to live life as a girl.
The right thing to do? Are you kidding me? What kind of jack@ss parents allow their 10-year old boy to dress like a girl when puberty hasn't even kicked in? The part of the brain that controls sexuality has not even developed by this age. How ignorant can these people be? How ignorant can the Huff Puff be, suggesting this is a positive thing to do for this child? Do they have any idea how difficult of a life this child will have? What happens if the child changes their mind later on?
I suppose I have to respect the rights of these parents to do what they like but, I do see this as abuse. These parents are obviously more interested in giving into whatever this child wants, rather than trying to steer this child into a moral, responsible lifestyle. They seem to be taking on the role of being good friends with their child, rather than being a parent. It is certainly one thing for an adult to make this decision but, for a 10-year old child to have this choice is absurd.
Comment below.
21 comments:
What does it matter to you?
Not even the parents can decide a child's morals growing up, so neither should you...
SEXUALITY might kick in during puberty, but GENDER defined by the brain is decided in the womb BEFORE genitals have developed. And even then, before puberty, every kid has their little crushes, so puberty has nothing to do with it either...
If the child believes they are in the wrong body BEFORE puberty, that is the most reliable time to believe the child before hormones turn them into an even more confused teen. The fact that she came to her parents, feeling tortured by her boy body, if her suffering is as bad as it suggests, her life would be even HARDER than what you suggest, because having to live with the disconnect of body and mind inhibits one from doing almost anything, often leading to suicide by the age of 30...
If the girl does change her mind later on, well then its on her own head and she will have to realize that on her own, mistakes cant be easily undone, isn't that leaning towards responsibility?
While life will never be the same for her, not acting on the way she feels would have led to a worse road and the fact her parents support her is commendable.
Parents are supposed to do what is right, not what the child "feels." What business is it of mine? Fine, it's not my business. I guess when I see a child being abused, I no longer have to worry. Is this what you're advocating? I'm not saying there's not another argument here because it is a very complicated situation but, this is definitely some form of a abuse.
How is a child supposed to know and understand how a woman feels? Are you kidding me? Being a woman is more than putting on a dress!!! This child has NO clue what being a woman or a man is. That's why we call 10 year olds CHILDREN.
Oh well if the child "gets it wrong"? Oh well? It's "on her own head"? He's 10 years old! That's why 10 year old CHILDREN have parents.
Sorry. I have to totally disagree with your assessment but, thank you so much for your comments!
I think this is probably the worst thing I've ever heard: "Not even the parents can decide a child's morals growing up, so neither should you..."
A parent does not decide morals?! That's NOT a parent. That's a sperm or egg donor.
Its called 'raising your child and instilling morals and values in them.'
Anonymous obviously has no children. Do us a favor, Anon, and don't ever have any.
reminds me of "Big Daddy" when he lets the little kid dress himself and calls him Fwankenstein. it might seem like the nice thing to do but surely not the right thing to do. they are called CHILDREN for a reason, because they arnt adults. what they want doesnt matter
Controlling a child's moral destination is only an ideal and 90% of the time, it doesn't happen. Believe it or not, children have brains too and the only thing seperating teens from adults is puberty, so if puberty were out of the picture, 9 year old girls would be adults and 12 year old boys would be adults, just as it was 300 years ago when they were expected to have families at those ages... You can believe that by letting her do this is child abuse, but in reality, she will be abused either way - by herself for the rest of her life had she stayed a boy, or by people that look down on this. There are hundreds of thousands of people suffering through disorders like hers and very few have the support of their parents even when they are 'adults' which is what makes this story significant, whether you believe its right or wrong.
"How is a child supposed to know and understand how a woman feels? Are you kidding me? Being a woman is more than putting on a dress!!! This child has NO clue what being a woman or a man is."
Thats what puberty is for. And shes just in time for it.
"That's why we call 10 year olds CHILDREN. "
Even children know right from wrong and when something doesn't feel right with themselves...
Which is the lesser of two 'evils' to you?
I would rather you not have children, as Hal said. Your lackluster attitude for raising children is a high concern and one that is a rising epidemic in this country. It is why we have so many problems. People simply do not care about their children anymore. It is more important for them to be "Politically correct" and conform to mainstream media "values" rather than accepting that there are universal truths and laws.
There is NOTHING adult about 12-year old child either. We do not live in a culture from 300 years ago, nor one that is 3rd world. Children do not all *know* right from wrong. How are they to know unless they have parents who are MORALLY GUIDING them?! You are talking out of both sides of your mouth. You don't want parents to guide their children, but how else are they to know right from wrong? It's not innate. Behavior is LEARNED. Psychology 101.
Children are blank canvases that need guidance. This is a totally abnormal behavior, on the part of the child and the parents. What are the parents doing that a child would even think to themselves they do not belong in the body they were given? This should be the LAST thing on a child's mind. This is the question they should be asking themselves, not giving their boy a dress to embarrass himself with.
It is one thing for a 17-year old to go through this but not a child who has a brain that has yet to even be fully developed. I would hope that you use some common sense and think this out a little better, just like this couple should.
I think of your response as something just parroted by the mainstream media and not of your own, well-thought-out opinion.
"Controlling a child's moral destination is only an ideal and 90% of the time, it doesn't happen."
Absolutely total rubbish! Where would you even get this idea from? Please tell me what research project this "supposed" statistic came from?
http://www.soundvision.com/Info/teens/stat.asp
Im nearly positive no moral parent would agree to anything on that list... If you combine each of the relative factors, its around 90% of teenagers... And these statistics are all over the place, not just this site.
"It is one thing for a 17-year old to go through this but not a child who has a brain that has yet to even be fully developed" Well wouldn't a 17 year old suffering through it be the same as a 17 year old suffering through it since they came out about it at 10 years old? And you would neglect how the child feels during the hardest time of their life?
Mainstream media has nothing to do with my opinion. I believe that everyone has the right to control their own lifestyle, and that no one should do it for them. That only those that don't think and allow others to think for them should be controlled and that when one does start thinking for themself, should be rewarded and not condemned... Those that try to control, often inhibit more than they believe they are helping...
"What are the parents doing that a child would even think to themselves they do not belong in the body they were given?"
If you watched the recordings of the child that played in the broadcast, the parents gave the child choices to pick from, and they DID try to influence him towards boyhood. But gender is decided by the brain in the womb. And a flaw in the tabula rasa theory is that by stating they are a blank canvas goes against natural instinct and is essentially saying they don't have a brain at all. How does that work out?
"People simply do not care about their children anymore."
Well these parents obviously care... They would rather have their son become a girl than watch him commit suicide later in life...
Your site is some Islamic site that has to do with teenagers and no, there is nothing to suggest that 90 percent of them are not influenced by their families. Where did you take your statistics course, that you somehow were able to magically come to this conclusion? Your assertion is based on FEELINGS and not facts. That is NOT how statistics work in the slightest. I think you need to take a reputable statistics course. Hopefully one in a classroom and not online. Seriously, no offense but, this site is comparing apples to oranges. There is NOTHING even on here that talks about transgender.
Again, this is NOT a teenager. We are talking about a child. Everyone is a product of their environment. Children ARE influenced by their families whether you would like to admit that or not. This poor child doesn't even have a chance at normalcy.
What irritates me the most is not a family doing what they want to do but, that the article makes the judgement that this is somehow the "right" thing to do. For people who are so concerned about being politically correct and hate anyone who stands up for moral behavior, the Huffington Post has no problem with telling people what THEY believe is "right" and lecturing others. This is the hypocritical crap that comes from liberals that I simply cannot stand.
I would not have even known about this family or what they were doing had I not been exposed to this by a news source who purposely tries to lecture the general public, all the while calling everyone else bad or wrong.
The couple is doing what they want. Fine. I have a right to my opinion as they do theirs but, the media needs to stop shoving this down our throats as if it's "normal." Let's wait and see how this kid grows up before we start lecturing people, don't ya think?
"Well these parents obviously care... They would rather have their son become a girl than watch him commit suicide later in life..."
Where did you read that the child was going to kill themselves? How is it that you are drawing this obscure, radical, crazed conclusions? So if the kid is raised to appreciate the body that was given to them and encouraged to act like a CHILD and not worry about sex, they will kill themselves? Why are you trying to make these crazy conclusions and force people into silly false dichotomies? That is absolutely insane! One has nothing to do with the other.
Logic. Learn it.
Gender is decided by the male's female and male sperm. If the girl sperm 'cracks' the egg, the baby is a girl. Otherwise, the baby is a boy.Sexual 'preference is decided by the person's spiritual mind.
Right and this is a BOY who has some psychological issues that do NOT need to be compounded by "parents" who clearly have major issues themselves.
"The media needs to stop shoving this down our throats as if it's "normal." Let's wait and see how this kid grows up before we start lecturing people, don't ya think?"
Fair enough, as long as you know that everyone is their own gatekeeper to the knowledge they learn and retain. media hasn't shoved this down anyone's throat, everyone that chose to click on the headline and read the story did it to themselves.
"Where did you read that the child was going to kill themselves?"
"Jackie came to her mom with tears in her eyes and said,'I am a girl, and I can't do this anymore.'"
With a little research of transgenders and closetcase transgenders, even googling "transgender suicide rates" the numbers are impressive... I apologize for making a common assumption.
"So if the kid is raised to appreciate the body that was given to them and encouraged to act like a CHILD and not worry about sex, they will kill themselves?"
The kid can not live as a child forever, and in teenage years when they're looking for a sense of identity over anything, what is she going to recall first? Hmmm.... As the generalized prediction of closet cases, suicide is the easiest answer to get out of the body when they've had enough.
"I would not have even known about this family or what they were doing had I not been exposed to this by a news source who purposely tries to lecture the general public, all the while calling everyone else bad or wrong. "
Where did you read in the article you linked, that everyone else is bad or wrong? And how was it at all, a lecture? They reported a story to shed light on an issue that many hide themselves from, and that was all... No lecture telling people to accept it...
The VERY FIRST line of the article is an opinion, and a judgement.
"Turns out there are parents in the news who do the right thing. Jennifer and John of Ohio have a transgender 10-year-old child, and they support Jackie's decision to live life as a girl."
I do not make the news. I simply respond to it or, if I do not have a strong opinion, I will simply report what the major stories are and leave it at that. The Huffington Post has become a major source of information for many people and for them to assert to their public that this is "right" is them lecturing others. Why not just report the story? Or why report this story at all? If it's not a big deal, why report it in the news?
This site is about trying to provide a little "Alternative" opinion to mainstream news.
I think it's VERY dangerous to assume that if a child doesn't get their way they will kill themselves. This is like saying to parents that if they don't give in to what their child wants, their child will off themselves. That is presenting a false dichotomy. Transgender people DO suffer from depression, much like everyone else. If they suffer at a higher rate than the rest of population, then that is all the more reason to be concerned that a family would want to support such a self-destructive behavior.
My opinion is that this is abuse in the highest order. This child needs serious help and therapy to figure out what influences are making this child think in such limited terms. Again, this is a child who does not even have a fully developed brain. This DOES have to do with sexuality, not gender. As you said, the gender was already chosen. Their dislike for their own gender comes from environmental influences.
"It has been only relatively recently that there has been recognition that gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender youth (generally defined as ages 15-24) are at an increased risk of suicide compared to other youth. A growing body of research literature has provided the estimate that gays, lesbians, and bisexual youth attempt suicide at a rate 2-3 times higher than their heterosexual peers. Some studies indicate that the rate of attempted suicide for transgender youth is higher than 50%. These studies are not documenting only a recent phenomenon; some are retrospective studies, interviewing older members of these minority groups and finding higher rates for attempted suicide during these individuals' youth decades ago. It is only the attention to this problem that is recent."
http://www.unhcc.unh.edu/resources/glbt_suicide.html
Yes. There are other sites as well; I just looked it up. All the more proof that something is very wrong with this lifestyle. Just another symptom of many that indicates that this is abnormal.
Well... No life changing decisions have been made, only lifestyle changes, which the child has done to themself... maybe its a phase, who knows...
What I cant stand is those that refuse to accept something like this, whether its real, an illusion, or a disorder. The mental and physical effect and out come are real and it should be respected as such, and that is why so many people like this suffer... I agree, the child should atleast see a councler, specialist, and therapist before starting something like this, and its poor parenting for not seeking that out, but I wouldn't call it abuse. Remember they have a perfectly normal, older daughter.
Children make mistakes, adults make mistakes, and everyone learns from their own mistakes. If Jackie has to adjust to the lifestyle before anything can truly change, and that will give her plenty of time to decide to stick to it or not...
Of course being abnormal is difficult just in itself. And being shunned because of a feeling that can not be helped is what leads to the suffering. The parents are doing more by recognizing it than by doing nothing and trying to get them to ignore it...
If there were a mental cure for it, society would have a much easier time, but thats not reality, so it can not be ignored..
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